Kaddish for unasked questions: on interviewing my father

This paper explores the author’s interview with her father, a Holocaust survivor. It asks how the circumstances of the interview, particularly the relationship between father, daughter, and gestating grandchild, impacted the exchange. Drawing on Henry Greenspan’s work and mentorship, it examines the grief of an unfinished story. Invoking the metaphor of the Kaddish prayer, she argues that the nature of listening is as contingent as the act of recounting. By centering these multiple contingencies, we can better engage with the complexities and humanity of survivors and their memories, enabling us to keep learning from them even after they are gone.